Letter to my brother

I posted previously about my relationship with my brother, and how it's varied between non-existant and hellish the last year. I was talking with my mom a few weeks ago, saying I just didn't understand why he was angry with me, and she said he was angry about me "whoring around disrespecting Joe." This is the same person who told me just a week or so before Joe died, that he hated him, he's never liked him, etc. After Joe died, he said he felt bad for saying that. I reassured him that I never told Joe and I guess the guilt has left and he no longer remembers. I am just so tired of the anger and hurt I both feel toward my brother and from him. So, I emailed this to him a week ago:

(Brother),

I realize that you may be going through some rough times right now, and I'm sorry for that. I want to be there for you in whatever capacity you need, and I'd like to know when I need you, you'll be there for me as well (emotionally, or whatever). We haven't been getting along for a while now, and I'd like to change that. Our current relationship makes me really sad. I miss how we used to get along. I know that you don't approve of everything I do, or have done, and that's OK. There have been some issues in my life that you have no idea about (no one does), that have influenced the way I have acted sometimes. That's not a cop-out, or excuse, just the way it is. I admit sometimes I've just been a dumbass. The bottom line is, we are both adults, and we won't always like what the other person does all the time. Can we both forgive and move on? I love you, and I want my brother back. We can have disagreements, but not this horrible feeling that's going on now. I don't like it, do you?

If you want, we can talk alone about whatever is bothering us, to get it all out in the open once and for all. Or, we can just decide to let what's in the past, be in the past and move on. Please, just don't continue this hate and anger. Life is too short. If one of us were to die right now, I think the other one would feel horrible that we didn't resolve things. I don't want to have one of those relationships where one goes years without talking to the other. It's already been many months since we've had a good relationship. Let's not let it go any longer, ok? It's a new year, let's make a fresh start.

Please let me know what you think.

Love,
(Me)

I hadn't gotten a response, so yesterday I asked him if he got my email. He said yes. I asked him was he going to respond, he said not at this time. WTF??? I've done all I can do. If he wants to continue judging me for things he knows nothing about, I guess I can't change that. I've reached out to him, I don't know what else I can do.