Red flags? Or he just cares a lot?

E, the older guy I've been seeing, is giving me pause with some of his actions. In a way I like it, but at the same time part of me doesn't. As "June Cleaver-ish" as this may sound, maybe that's the women's lib influence? And I don't mean that in a good way. After all, what kind of man have I said I like? Confident, assertive, take-charge, a "man's man." I like traditional marriages. I like the security I think I would feel with that. But I hate being told I can't do something. It makes me feel rebellious. The widows have been up in arms, so to speak, saying that he's dangerous and I should dump him, but I think I'm going to ride it out for now and see what happens.

Examples of questionable behavior:

First, he's lied about his age. His profile said 38, he told me 45, but he's really 51 (I found this out by internet. I also secretly checked his driver's license to confirm.) It's not a dealbreaker, but I wish he would be honest, although if he had, I would not have given him a second glance.

When we were first talking, he indicated he wouldn't have a problem converting to Catholicism (he's kinda nothing I guess). In more recent conversation he's indicated he wouldn't.

He likes animals, but not inside the house. He says they make the house smell and you can't have nice things. He's suggested building a really nice enclosure outside for the dogs. I've been resistant but I've been coming around more to the idea, under the right circumstances. I'm actually kind of tired of pet mess (hair, dirt, litterboxes, etc.) all over the place. I thought he would blow a gasket though, when he found out sometimes the dogs sleep in bed with me. I didn't know if I should be offended or laugh, LOL.

If I don't answer the phone when he calls, sometimes he'll call back 3 or so times in the next half hour. Once he left a message sounding a little put off, but I guess I probably would be feeling that too. When I called him back the next day, he said he thought I abandoned him (joking? Not sure.) I told him of course not, that I had a headache and went to sleep early, and he asked, "A headache from me?" Cue sad puppy-dog eyes.

I told him about 2 trips I'm taking over the next several weeks. We've been spending pretty much every weekend together, so I understand the disappointed feeling. One trip is next weekend to go to MD/PA. The other trip is with my family to Sanibel Island. E has made several comments like "Why do you want to leave me?" "Why do you want me to be lonely?" although he did follow up once by saying of course he works out of town and can't tell me not to go out of town but that he'll miss me. More recently he's suggested twice that he could go along with me to MD/PA. I've kind of laughed it off and pointed out he would have to take off work, etc., but he said he would. In later conversation he's said it's not appropriate for married people (men or women) to go off overnight with their friends. I don't agree with this and I've told him as much. This could turn into a non-negotiable issue, I'll have to see.

I've teased him a few times that I wanted to get more tattoos (I have 3 currently). He says he doesn't think I should, that too much of anything is tacky. I've teased/threatened to get something really big and horrible and he's (teased back?) said that he wouldn't talk to me if I got another tattoo. He said something about the ones I already have are just a part of me, but that he couldn't look at new ones knowing they were just recently put there, or something like that?

This might seem trivial, but 2 weekends ago, we were discussing getting Thai for lunch, left the house, then I called my mom for directions to a museum we were going to visit. While I'm on the phone, he apparently decided to go to a different restaurant and pulls in without asking my opinion or saying anything other than "we're here." I thought that was a little odd.

He didn't come in town last weekend, so I've been in withdrawals I guess. He is coming this weekend, and I told him I might board the dogs so I don't have to leave so early in the morning to take care of them. I also asked if I wanted to kidnap him and take him somewhere, would he go? He said yes. The next day I found out the kennel was full and emailed to let him know. He wrote back "oh, so you can't go out of town with me?" I replied unfortunately not this weekend. When I talked to him later that night he was asking me questions about my address, which address did I use for legal purposes, etc. He was being mysterious about it so I pressed for info. It turns out he was giving my basic info to his company because he can sometimes get free flights and he was thinking of taking me to Cancun this weekend! I hated to burst his bubble by saying I didn't have a passport and he says oh, I guess it's a good thing I didn't complete the process, referring to booking the flights. I thought it was odd how I had suggested ME taking HIM off somewhere, and yet he started making conflicting plans. Mom says maybe he thinks I'm hinting I want him to take me somewhere and that's why he's doing it. I hope that's the case, and he's not just trying to completely run the show.

Sometimes when I talk to him at night, I'll sit in my car in the driveway because it's cooler and quieter outside. He's said before that he doesn't like me doing that because it's dangerous, that someone could come up and get me. Last night we were talking and he found out I was outside and he gently said (I think, there was some static) "you know the rules" and then something about it's not safe he wanted me to go inside. But the "rules" part threw me. Did he really say that? I can't be sure but I'm maybe 80% confident he did.

So, this is the questionable behavior so far. He has a lot of good qualities too. He's talked about dressing me in traditional Nigerian clothes to make me "look like a queen." It's very flattering to have that sort of care taken over me, but is it enough to outweigh the red flags?